In "Preparation"

We will be living in 15 days....it seems crazy that we are FINALLY at this point. Of course, now that we are, I am feeling suddenly unprepared. ;) I have been pouring over pick up trip stories on blogs. Both current and older. I LOVE being able to read other people's stories. We have been praying that Simon will eat on the pick up trip. We don't really think he will drink, I will pray for that too but it would be a very unexpected surprise if he does. Judging from others getting their kids from Simon's orphanage we have about a 50/50 chance he will eat :) HOWEVER, we did feed him a lot during our visits with him, which I think is unusual, and I am very hopeful that will help us.

We have a couple doctor visits already set up for when we get home. I have been preparing a folder for all of Simon's records in it. He will see the pediatrician on Monday the 26th and they already have his records. Since Jon's sister works at the office and Simon will see Ishmael's doctor, they already know us and know about Simon's story. However, the pediatric cardiologist does not. We are seeing them on Tuesday the 27th to check Simon's heart, yesterday I prepared a letter to go with the records that explains his neglect. I am hopeful that it will help them understand where we are coming from. In it I included a copy of the article from April 2012 about the orphanage. I am asking them to do the least invasive and extensive testing as they can (I know that sounds weird) if things can wait 3-6months, I would like to wait. We want to get his heart checked out of precaution, but I really want to get him home and hold up and feed him for a few months.

Speaking of holding up in our home. I am also trying to work on our letter/blog post to our family and friends. Adoption people, experts and families, suggest "cocooning" when you bring a child home. I am having trouble figuring out how we are going to do that. I do know that I will need to let people know that we are going to be the only ones to feed or change Simon. This should help him figure out we are his parents. The experts suggest that you don't let a lot of people come and go during the first few months that your child is home. This is where things get a little weird for me. The fact is, Simon's life will be full of people coming and going, we live in community, so that is what our life is like. Also, this is sort of what he is used to... I do see the value in us hanging out at home a lot...so we will probably do that. I am conflicted by this whole thing, because reality we will just end up following cues from Simon and making it up as we go along. However, I am haunted by the "experts" that make it sound like I could screw up our relationship with Simon for life. I suppose that is how parenting experts make us all feel??

As a side note, I have found it very interesting to be researching adoption "attachment" parenting as I work in a community of people who are "attachment parents". I am thinking one of these groups need to change their name :) The attachment parents I know are people who nurse their kids past what is "socially acceptable", who co-sleep, and wear their babies and generally spend lots of time with their kids. Some go to an extreme of never telling their child no, but those people are on one extreme end of the spectrum. Most of these parents are also naturally minded, so less medical intervention, antibiotic avoidance, some vaccination avoidance and good organic eating. However, attachment adoption parenting doesn't seem to apply any of these principles??? I am still working the whole thing out in my head.

I am preparing myself for the medical journey we are going to be starting. I am trying to do my research so that when we go to the doctor I am able to make medical decision based on both research and knowledge of Simon's neglect. Meaning, I don't want to just do every intervention that is suggested, I want to examine it in light of SImon's healing as a whole person. For example, I would like to do a titer to see what vaccines he might need, rather than just redo all vaccines. Also, before any vaccines are done, I want to wait until he is healthier as we have no idea how is immune system works and vaccines are made AND tested on HEALTHY children, not severely neglected 20 pound 9 year old. Another example to me is his swallowing problems. We don't know if that is a physical problem or a psychological problem, the result of choking down propped bottles for 7 years. So, if he is eating, then I would like to wait to test the heck out of his swallow....that can wait until he has learned to trust us.

Well, there are my meander-y thoughts and preparations right now. I will try to do another post in the preparation section again soon. My hope is that it will be a little more....focused. :)

Thanks again, for following our journey. Without our wonderful network of friends, family and strangers giving to us, praying for us and encouraging us, we wouldn't be here, 2 weeks away from bringing SImon home!!!!!!!!!!!!!